A woman's story · Binding Up the Brokenhearted
A mother struggles
adoring and wide and heavy lashed
These eyes that love me
are so difficult to look into
so difficult
Trust and Wonder and Love
pour out of them
so difficult
Tiny hands reach up
and beg me to love them
the inviting arms waiting
This soft skin is a witness
against me
This innocent a key witness
in the trial of the murder
of my unborn
She who adores me
crushes me to the earth
my punishment is to love her desperately
all the days of my life
My life with my newborn began with weeping, and continued that way until she was a toddler. I was sure that my punishment was to be the perfect mother to this precious one to atone for what I had done, but at the same time I knew I was the worst mother, because I killed my first child. What a rock and a hard place to parent from. And this is how I would have continued, if healing had not come from the Word of God, the only Word that gives life and true freedom and peace to those who, through perhaps misery, finally humble themselves enough to look for it. I was healed and freed up from the guilt that sought to crush me. Thank you Healing Hearts! Thank you God!!
