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June 2019 Prayer Letter
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![Healing Hearts Ministries Internaional [LOGO]](https://www.healinghearts.org/nimages/HHLetterhead_Web700.png) Dear Friend,  Part of our 2019 series of leadership testimonies  Memories are a fickle thing, and I am always amazed how God created us to remember certain things and forget others. It has been 30 years since the events surrounding my abortion experience as a young man, yet many of those memories are as clear to me as if they had happened yesterday. Although those memories are crystal clear, I chose to hide them in the back of my mind for years before I came to grips with being complicit as the father in the abortion of my child. I was a 17-year-old, hormone-driven young man who was just coming out of my shell to experience dating for the first time. That summer I ditched my glasses for contacts and my braces were removed. I was very attracted to the opposite sex and was eager to start dating. I began dating a close friend of mine, and our relationship became physical very quickly. Unfortunately, I was not a Christian and did not attend church, so as far as I was concerned at the time, I wasn’t remotely interested in God. I will never forget that night. Not only was it the first time I had sex, it was also the night my girlfriend became pregnant. I still have some old photos from that evening because we went to the Sadie Hawkins dance at our high school. We were both dressed up in Sadie Hawkins-like country clothing including straw hats, jeans, and plaid shirts. After the dance, we drove to my parent’s house where we went downstairs to the basement to watch television while my parents watched television in the den. It didn’t take long for us to move to my basement bedroom and lock the door―and then the clothes were flying. We had one thing on our minds, and birth control was not anything we had talked about or pursued. It was our first time and the only time we had sex together, and in that one moment, a child was conceived—our child. While the memories leading up to that point are crystal clear to me, what happened afterward is still foggy to this day. All I can remember is the two of us taking a walk together after school several weeks later and her telling me that she missed her period. I remember the look of terror on her face when she thought of her mother finding out. The rest is unclear and a bit fuzzy―panic and confusion entered my mind and clouded everything. I do remember asking her what she wanted to do and telling her that I would support her in any decision she made. I don’t know if I said that because I was being supportive or because in my mind, abortion was the only option. She wanted an abortion but could not pay for it because then her parents would find out. “I’ll take care of that,” I told her, and thus began the next step of our journey. A few weeks later, I mustered up the courage to ask my parents for the money, which was money I had earned from working part-time since I was 15 years old. But I had to tell them what the money was going to be used for, and in that moment I thought my life was over. While my parents were disappointed, they seemed to be understanding. They gave me the money I had been saving up, so that I could pay for the abortion. On a Saturday morning, I took my girlfriend to a women’s clinic less than a mile from my house. Most of that trip is a blur in my mind. I do remember sitting in the waiting room watching other couples and some single women going in and out of the office. For what seemed like an eternity, I sat there and tried to read a book. For the first time in my life, I was truly scared. I didn’t know what was going to happen, and I didn’t know what was going on in the doctor’s office where my girlfriend was having the procedure. Finally, she came out and it was all over. Our relationship ended that day, and while we remained friends, we would only see each other a few times at school, never talking about what had happened. My life moved on. I started dating another girl, then I started college, and I never saw her again. The memories of the abortion were pushed to the back of my mind for years. I told other girlfriends about the experience but never confronted in my heart and mind what had really happened. I had participated in and sanctioned the murder of my own child. From that day on, I fell into a vicious cyle of dating women for a period of time, having sex soon after meeting, moving on to the next, always searching for something more. It wasn’t until my early thirties, after a bad breakup with a young woman, that I realized what I was searching for the entire time had always been there. I just hadn’t been willing to allow Jesus to get close. I broke down in tears, knowing that there was a God-shaped hole in my heart. I accepted Christ as my Savior and for the first time I began to discuss and deal with the mental ramifications of my abortion experience. In October 2003, on my knees and crying out to God, I accepted Jesus Christ as my savior. Formerly, I thought my hope was in the women I dated, that I could be happy if I just found a wife. God had a different plan for me, and that was to first break my heart to realize that I needed Jesus more than anything else.  In the years after my salvation, I experienced grace and mercy and God’s providence in many ways. For years I had longed to find a wife and start a family, and God orchestrated that by putting in my path Marci Caldwell, a beautiful woman who had a similar experience to mine―she’d had an abortion. In the spring of 2009, I listened to Marci’s testimony in a Singles’ Bible fellowship class, and from that moment I knew I had to marry her. We were engaged in December 2010 and married in March 2011, and soon afterward I started seminary. My wife then shared with me about the ministry of Healing Hearts and how God had used it in her life to bring healing after her abortion. At the time, she was going through training to become a Healing Hearts leader. I decided to go through the Restoring a Father’s Heart Bible study (formerly Wounded Warrior), and then I took the training to become a Healing Hearts counselor. While I can never erase the memory of my abortion, I shouldn’t forget it, because through God’s grace and mercy He has healed the pain that I buried for years. In His Providence, God sent me a beautiful wife who had gone through a similar experience, received healing, and shared with me the ministry of Healing Hearts. Jeremiah 29:11 tells us that God has a plan for each of us, and that His plans are for our good and our welfare. Despite our past and the dark journeys we have taken, in Christ that journey is redeemed and full of grace, mercy, and a hope eternal. Memories are powerful reminders of our past, but Christ’s healing power reminds us that our identity is in Him, not in the images and sins of our past. - R.W. Morehead Dear Friend, I trust that you know that when you donate and pray for Healing Hearts Ministries, you are helping to pave the path for men like R.W. and his wife to find their way to the life-changing truths found in Healing Hearts’ Bible studies and discipleship counseling. As they are healed, we can train, equip, and send out many of these same individuals to minister to others in need of healing. Your gifts allow us to be an agent of hope for the brokenhearted individuals that the world would cast aside, marginalize, or simply have no way to help. Thank you for allowing us to extend God’s transforming grace on your behalf!
- Sue Liljenberg, President/International Director |
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To Make a DonationYou may use the donation form on our website to make a donation, or you may also submit your check to the address provided below. Healing Hearts Ministries is a federally registered non-profit corporation, all contributions are tax deductible. One hundred percent of all contributions made to Healing Hearts go directly toward supporting the various aspects of our ministry no "administrative fee" is collected by a fund-raising service. All donations and expenditures are internally and independently monitored and audited. Annual financial statements are available upon request. We thank you for considering contributing to our ministry. Your contribution will enable us to reach out and touch individuals who need the hope and healing message that only Jesus has to offer. To donate online click this link: https://www.healinghearts.org/donate Send checks to: Healing Hearts Ministries PO Box 44670 Rio Rancho, NM 87174 phone (505) 355-6922 |